I found this in my 9-year-old’s drawer near her record player. There’s a black, sticky residue on the bottom. I shared it in my gardening group on the Tedooo app where I sell, and they suggested I ask here.
It gave me that sinking feeling you get when you think your child might be hiding something. She told me it was for candles, but we don’t have candles. Last week she asked if a new friend could sleep over, the one whose mom “works nights,” the one who showed her that TikTok dance about pills. Now I’m seeing this lighter tucked away under her diary.
I remember when her secrets were about imaginary friends. Now I’m looking things up and trying not to panic. My husband thinks I’m overreacting and says she’s only nine, but he didn’t find the lighter.
I’ve asked around, even posted in groups, trying to figure it out. One person messaged me privately and said to look into her friend group. Tomorrow I’ll have to talk to her and figure out what’s going on, even if it means becoming the kind of parent I never thought I’d be.
She used to tell me everything. I keep wondering when that changed, and what I might still be missing.
